A Safe Place to Start: How Whitney Carlson Helps Teens and Families Heal

Understanding can begin when we stop focusing only on a child’s behavior and start listening to what their brain and body are trying to tell us. Therapy can be intimidating for adolescents. Talking to someone new is not always easy. That is why my goal is to meet each adolescent and family where they are and create an environment that feels safe and trusting.

One of my favorite parts of being an adolescent and family therapist is having the opportunity to be creative and incorporate an adolescent’s interests into the therapeutic space. Art therapy and play therapy are important parts of my approach. They can help adolescents feel more comfortable while we also focus on their needs and the challenges they face in daily life.

Therapy can feel intimidating for parents and caregivers, too. Many wonder, “What if my child doesn’t talk or participate?” or “How can I trust this person?” Those are understandable concerns. My goal is to work collaboratively with caregivers and build a strong relationship not only with the adolescent, but with the whole family. Adolescents may take time to open up in therapy, and that is okay. My job is not to rush that process. It is to help adolescents feel comfortable and safe as they begin their therapy journey.

Preparing for Trauma Therapy

I am trained in Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT). I like to think of this approach as similar to preparing for a camping trip. You don’t just drive into the woods and hope for the best, you prepare. You make sure you have water, a flashlight, a tent that won’t leak, and everything else you may need along the way.

The same idea applies when working with an adolescent who has experienced trauma: we don’t jump right into talking about the trauma. We prepare first. Before beginning trauma processing, I help the adolescent build the knowledge and skills needed to recognize and manage challenging emotions. These are practical tools they can use not only in therapy, but in daily life.

Many times, people feel like they can ignore the trauma that maybe, if they try hard enough, it will disappear. But even when you try to push the memories down, your body and nervous system still remember what happened. Your brain is working hard to avoid it, while your body may feel like it is always in attack mode. It can be easy to feel mad at your brain or body for holding on to something you just want to forget. Learning to forgive your body and brain can be a difficult part of healing. Part of trauma can be stored in the sensations you feel, while another part is stored in the story of what happened. TF-CBT can help you build the skills to notice the signs in your body and process that feeling of always being on the lookout.

Your brain and body may be working in overdrive and can be triggered throughout the day by smells, sounds, places, and situations. Over time, this can become exhausting. Your body may be constantly firing off fear signals in response to things that are not actually dangerous in the present moment. It is like a fire alarm going off multiple times a day, even though there is no fire nearby. Your body might go into fight, flight, freeze, or fawn. “Fight” in a child might look like yelling, arguing, or becoming physically aggressive. “Flight” might present as running away, avoiding people or situations, or trying to escape uncomfortable feelings. “Freeze” may include shutting down, becoming quiet or feeling stuck. “Fawn” might look like trying to please everyone or agreeing when they feel uncomfortable. Recognizing how your body reacts is the first step toward managing these automatic responses. These reactions are ways the brain and body try to keep us safe, but we do not always need to be on guard or anxiously waiting for something bad to happen. Therapy will be focused on recognizing these behaviors and helping your brain and body heal. This is not a conscious decision you are making, and it is not something you are doing wrong. It is your body holding on to something that has already passed and trying its best to protect you.

Everyone processes trauma differently. It can be easy to compare your experience to someone else’s and think, “I should be fine. It wasn’t that bad.” Coming to terms with what happened can be difficult. I want to help you feel safe, secure, and free from judgment as you share your experiences and process scary or upsetting events. Choose yourself. Choose to listen to your body. You do not have to process what happened alone.

Building Skills and Moving Forward

TF-CBT utilizes a trauma narrative that is tailored to each client’s needs and preferences. Adolescents receive support every step of the way as they use the skills they have learned to process their experiences. After completing the narrative, we focus on strengthening future resilience and safety.

Think of it like packing up after that camping trip. We don’t just walk away. We make sure everything is organized and ready in case those supplies are needed again. TF-CBT works in a similar way: it equips adolescents with skills and knowledge they can carry with them and use in many situations throughout their lives.

Caregivers also play an important role in TF-CBT. Throughout the process, caregivers gain knowledge and practice parenting skills that can help them support their child. Caregivers will gain knowledge about trauma responses and skills to communicate with their child about the trauma. Talking about trauma can feel uncomfortable and families may not know how to begin these difficult conversations. Therapy is not about forcing your family to talk before they are ready. Instead, it provides support and guidance so you can approach these conversations with confidence when the time is right. Caregivers will also learn de-escalation techniques to help their child work through difficult everyday emotions. Positive reinforcement will provide a foundation for helping your child learn how to work together as part of the family team. How these strategies look in your home will be tailored to your family’s unique needs and goals. The goal is for caregivers to leave therapy feeling confident using these skills at home to create a more connected and cohesive family environment. Raising a child is not easy, and raising a child who has experienced trauma can come with its own unique challenges. 

Therapy can feel scary to start, but feeling scared and choosing to take that first step anyway can open the door to connection, meaningful progress, and understanding. Whether your family is navigating trauma, everyday challenges, or uncertainty about what comes next, you do not have to navigate it alone. Together, we will prepare, pack the right tools, and take the next step forward. 

Disclaimer: The content on this blog is provided for informational and educational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional mental health care, medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Reading this content does not establish a therapeutic relationship. If you are experiencing mental health or medical concerns, please seek the guidance of a qualified healthcare provider.

Whitney Carlson, LMSW is a licensed clinical therapist with Ascend Therapy Group. She is experienced in treating trauma, and working with children, teens, and parents. Julia brings a creative approach to the therapeutic process, finding various creative outlets to engage with her clients. In her free time, Whitney enjoys spending time with family and friends, water skiing, and playing tennis. To work with Whitney, please reach out with the information below!

Thanks for reading! Please contact us below for more.

(248) 775-5171

whitneycarlson@ascendtherapyllc.com

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