The Riddle of Self-Acceptance And Key Concepts

There was a boy in a classroom who said he couldn’t handle the weight. His teacher said, “Put on your jacket and walk around the classroom.” He did that a few times, and then he took it off. The boy asked, “Why did you make me do that?”

The teacher replied, “When you first put on the jacket, you felt its weight. But as you walked around, you got used to it. The jacket didn’t get lighter - you got stronger. Now tell me, when you took it off, did you feel relieved?”

The boy nodded.

The teacher continued, “That’s because you were carrying something that wasn’t meant to stay on forever. The weight you’re feeling now? Some of it is like that jacket - you’ll grow strong enough to carry it. But some of it you’re meant to put down.”

The lesson: Self-acceptance isn’t about carrying every burden forever. It’s about knowing which weights make you stronger and which ones you need to release.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ This also provides a direct correlation to a couple of key concepts often discuss in the realm of therapy.

Think of, in this context, the weight you grow strong enough to carry as a concept called neuroplasticity. This is a scientific term for a process in which the brain forms new neural connections by undergoing novel experiences, and learning new skills. In essence, it means that we can in fact do hard things. Furthermore, by doing them, our brain rewires itself, and once seemingly hard things may become less difficult than before.

On the contrary there is toxic stress, which, unlike "normal" stress, occurs when a person is exposed to prolonged stressors over a long period of time, often without adequate support. When not properly dealt with, toxic stress can impact brain development, and put us at a higher risk of disease and illness later in life.

When a job, situation, or relationship cause us stress, it is important to uncover whether this is something that was meant to make us stronger, or whether it is something that we weren't meant to carry forever. The ability to distinguish between the may be of the utmost importance. for building resilience, and emotional well-being.